Thanks for reading!
- Vanessa
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Homemade Valentines Day Cards
Thanks for reading!
- Vanessa
Asking for Discounts
Pre-losing my job, I would have been embarrassed to ask for discounts on anything. Now, I hunt around for the best deals and ask if I qualify for discounts when I do purchase something. I signed my kids up for T-Ball/Baseball through the YMCA. YMCA is such a great organization! I utilize it often for free/low cost classes for my kids and I.
My family receives a financial assistance through one of the local YMCA branches, so we get a discount on membership and programs through that branch. The Baseball program is run through another local branch. I called to find out if I would be eligible for any discounts through this branch. They put me on hold and asked, Is a 50% discount ok? Ummmm... Let me think about that.... Yes! I was still a little embarrassed to ask, as I always am, but, I figure that the worst thing they can say is "no." It would have normally been $50 per kid, now it was $50 total!
When I first started asking about discounts, I was afraid of being judged as tacky. I still am a little, but saving money and being able to put my kids in a fun and healthy activity is worth it.
Thanks for reading!
- Vanessa
My family receives a financial assistance through one of the local YMCA branches, so we get a discount on membership and programs through that branch. The Baseball program is run through another local branch. I called to find out if I would be eligible for any discounts through this branch. They put me on hold and asked, Is a 50% discount ok? Ummmm... Let me think about that.... Yes! I was still a little embarrassed to ask, as I always am, but, I figure that the worst thing they can say is "no." It would have normally been $50 per kid, now it was $50 total!
When I first started asking about discounts, I was afraid of being judged as tacky. I still am a little, but saving money and being able to put my kids in a fun and healthy activity is worth it.
Thanks for reading!
- Vanessa
Monday, February 11, 2013
Anniversary Dates
My hubby and I had a long pre-dating period. We had both dated people that were about as far from being "the one" as possible. I was probably more reluctant than he was to get into a relationship. We were in that phase for about a year, so we both assumed that we were stuck in the "friend zone." He wanted a relationship, but I was still hesitant.
I was probably a little selfish and afraid. My future hubby was more eager to get into a relationship. I was happy having a cute friend to go out with and talk all night with. Plus, by not being in a relationship, I wouldn't get dumped or hurt. My previous relationships, needless to say, did not go well.
My BFF at the time, J, was also single. We had both gotten out of long-term/serious relationships. Well, hers was serious, my previous relationship was just long and painful. Neither of us had ever had a decent Valentine's Day, so we had an unspoken pact to remain single on that day, and just spoil ourselves and each other. We were both way better Valentines than our exes. I bought my first lingerie for myself that year and learned to spoil and take care of myself for once. I was pretty much a door mat to my exes, and spent more time trying to please them than taking care of myself.
However, my future hubby thought I was using this an excuse not to date him. On February 9th of that year, he told me how he really felt about me and asked me to be his girlfriend and Valentine. It was really sweet and I had felt the same way for a long time. I had been hoping to avoid the "relationship talk" until after Valentine's Day. J was a little mad at me for having a boyfriend, too.
Since we started officially dating on February 9th, the next day, I proposed to skip Valentine's Day. I know, I'm so romantic. I just thought it was too much pressure on a new relationship. He went all out, and it was a great Valentine's Day, and the greatest one of my life up until then.
We got married a little over a year later, in March. By the end of September that first year, he had started to ask about my dad's work schedule. The time he got off from work, and his days off. My parents and I were not close in my teen years, and I moved out the day after I graduated. I had been supporting myself financially since I was 17 years old. My parents divorced when I was 19, which brought my dad and I closer.
I spoiled my future hubby's plans to ask my dad's permission to marry me. I told him that if he needed to ask anyone's permission to marry me, it was mine and mine alone. And, if he did ask my dad's permission, he wouldn't have mine. It's a nice concept, but to me, it was a little offensive.
I think I changed his mind, or at least deterred him a little. He renewed his hinting about marriage in October. That year would be our first Christmas as a couple (and would be our last as just us, as we would discover a little later). We decided to wait until after Christmas to discuss marriage again. We also met the extended families that Christmas season. I admit I was wanting to know a little bit more of what I was getting into.
Into that new year, we talked more and more about getting married. Somehow, we had both decided that we were for sure getting married. My independence and stubbornness cheated myself out of a real proposal. I suggested getting married on February 9th, the anniversary of our first kiss. We had no idea what we were doing, so my mother-in-law thankfully stepped in to help us plan it. She proposed March 26th, as that would be more time to plan it, plus there were relatives that were already planning on being in town that weekend. That worked for us, plus it was an extra month of planning.
Our wedding was nice, though different than the one I had thought that I'd have. I had always pictured a casual, outdoor wedding in late summer and wearing a pretty floral dress. Instead, we had an indoor church wedding, with the traditional dress and veil, and all. About 2 weeks before Christmas, we found out we were pregnant.
It really was a beautiful ceremony, though. My dad, due to my previously mentioned stubbornness and independence, was taking bets that I'd get cold feet. I had forgotten my shoes before the ceremony and had to drive back to get them, and he thought for sure that it was just an excuse. I was 23 when I got married, which he thought was a little old. Like I said, I had issues with my parents.
For years, my hubby and I celebrated both anniversaries, February 9th and March 26th. Now, we pretty much celebrate just our wedding anniversary as "our anniversary."
I was probably a little selfish and afraid. My future hubby was more eager to get into a relationship. I was happy having a cute friend to go out with and talk all night with. Plus, by not being in a relationship, I wouldn't get dumped or hurt. My previous relationships, needless to say, did not go well.
My BFF at the time, J, was also single. We had both gotten out of long-term/serious relationships. Well, hers was serious, my previous relationship was just long and painful. Neither of us had ever had a decent Valentine's Day, so we had an unspoken pact to remain single on that day, and just spoil ourselves and each other. We were both way better Valentines than our exes. I bought my first lingerie for myself that year and learned to spoil and take care of myself for once. I was pretty much a door mat to my exes, and spent more time trying to please them than taking care of myself.
However, my future hubby thought I was using this an excuse not to date him. On February 9th of that year, he told me how he really felt about me and asked me to be his girlfriend and Valentine. It was really sweet and I had felt the same way for a long time. I had been hoping to avoid the "relationship talk" until after Valentine's Day. J was a little mad at me for having a boyfriend, too.
Since we started officially dating on February 9th, the next day, I proposed to skip Valentine's Day. I know, I'm so romantic. I just thought it was too much pressure on a new relationship. He went all out, and it was a great Valentine's Day, and the greatest one of my life up until then.
We got married a little over a year later, in March. By the end of September that first year, he had started to ask about my dad's work schedule. The time he got off from work, and his days off. My parents and I were not close in my teen years, and I moved out the day after I graduated. I had been supporting myself financially since I was 17 years old. My parents divorced when I was 19, which brought my dad and I closer.
I spoiled my future hubby's plans to ask my dad's permission to marry me. I told him that if he needed to ask anyone's permission to marry me, it was mine and mine alone. And, if he did ask my dad's permission, he wouldn't have mine. It's a nice concept, but to me, it was a little offensive.
I think I changed his mind, or at least deterred him a little. He renewed his hinting about marriage in October. That year would be our first Christmas as a couple (and would be our last as just us, as we would discover a little later). We decided to wait until after Christmas to discuss marriage again. We also met the extended families that Christmas season. I admit I was wanting to know a little bit more of what I was getting into.
Into that new year, we talked more and more about getting married. Somehow, we had both decided that we were for sure getting married. My independence and stubbornness cheated myself out of a real proposal. I suggested getting married on February 9th, the anniversary of our first kiss. We had no idea what we were doing, so my mother-in-law thankfully stepped in to help us plan it. She proposed March 26th, as that would be more time to plan it, plus there were relatives that were already planning on being in town that weekend. That worked for us, plus it was an extra month of planning.
Our wedding was nice, though different than the one I had thought that I'd have. I had always pictured a casual, outdoor wedding in late summer and wearing a pretty floral dress. Instead, we had an indoor church wedding, with the traditional dress and veil, and all. About 2 weeks before Christmas, we found out we were pregnant.
It really was a beautiful ceremony, though. My dad, due to my previously mentioned stubbornness and independence, was taking bets that I'd get cold feet. I had forgotten my shoes before the ceremony and had to drive back to get them, and he thought for sure that it was just an excuse. I was 23 when I got married, which he thought was a little old. Like I said, I had issues with my parents.
For years, my hubby and I celebrated both anniversaries, February 9th and March 26th. Now, we pretty much celebrate just our wedding anniversary as "our anniversary."
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
Seeing the World as Both a Mom and a Daughter
My 4-year-old daughter has been extra strong-willed and defiant lately. I know that it is normal for kids to test their limits (and their parents patience), but it is how strong-willed she is that gets to me the most. Thinking about my spats with my daughter makes me think back to my own testing of wills with my mother. My relationship with my mom is still not the best and not exactly what I desire, but at least we have some sort of understanding.
When I was in first grade and my sister, K, was in Kindergarten, my mom decided that my sister would look good with a perm in her hair. This was also in the '80s, and my mom permed her hair for way longer than was popular. She had just a little perm solution left and didn't want to waste it, so she wanted to use it to just perm my bangs. I did not want any part of my hair permed, let alone just my bangs. We got into a big argument (as was pretty common). I told her that I liked my hair and didn't want it permed. She just didn't want to waste the perm solution. She won, as she was a lot bigger than me and, even though I was stubborn, I was pretty obedient. I had to deal with just curly bangs, which I thought looked stupid. My sister had to deal with a full head of home permed hair, which wasn't much of an improvement over my hair.
My sister, D, had a security baby doll for years that she was pretty rough with. She used to drag it around by the hair, so her hair eventually was stuck in kind of a faux hawk. One day, while we were at school, my mom decided that she didn't like to look at the doll in our room and threw it away. Granted, when my kids break a toy, I throw it away, but other than having a permanent bad hair day, the doll was not broken, and D was very attached to it.
I believe that my mom saw my sisters and I as an extension of herself, and not our own selves with our own opinions and all. She liked certain styles, therefore, we had to, also. She didn't like other things, so therefore, we couldn't, either.
My favorite color is pink, and my daughter, K's, favorite color is bright purple. In a way, these colors sum us up. I really like light pink. It's subtle, yet pretty. My daughter is bold and vibrant. I try to consider what she would like when purchasing her clothes or anything else. I even correct my relatives when they are considering buying her anything. I know that she'd appreciate any new gift, but probably more so if it were also her favorite color. I actually resisted pink for a long time, and my favorite color was blue, though that may have been to spite my mom and resist wearing the pink that my mom forced on me. She believes that all girls should like pink. I believe that she would say that it is her favorite color, though I don't really think it is.
My hubby and I are redoing our kids' rooms, which is probably why my mom is on my mind more lately. My mom would redecorate the bedroom that my sisters and I shared whenever the mood struck her. She would see an idea in a magazine or in a movie and would redo our room without consulting us. Our room was redecorated a few times and I don't think any of us liked it, and I'm sure I told her so. I don't remember saying anything, but I wouldn't have put it past my younger self. I distinctly remember having bear and clown wall paper and then later it was painted mustard yellow.
I still don't like clowns or that shade of yellow. Had she consulted my sisters and I, we would have expressed our distaste before anything was done, instead of after she had put in all of the work to surprise us. It was a very vicious cycle with my mom. She'd like an idea and force it on us as hard as she could, and my sisters and I would tell her we didn't like it. She'd then play the martyr because she'd worked all day on redoing our room, just for us to tell her that we hated it. I can now partially see her side, as repainting a bedroom by yourself isn't easy. However, is it really a gift when someone sneaks into your room and paints it in ugly colors?
I did ballet when I was younger. I had always pictured my daughter doing ballet, just as I had. K did ballet last year. She enjoyed dressing up in the frilly outfit. Other than that, I suspect that she hated it. She said she enjoyed it, but she didn't like doing the precise movements and paying so much attention. There was just too much little and graceful movement for my bold and active daughter. My mom would have forced my sisters and I to continue. I found a gymnastics class for her to join, instead, and she loves it! There is much more running around and more movement. It is such a better fit for her, which makes me happy.
My hubby and I are including our kids in our redecorating brainstorming. Granted, we are working within a budget, so some of their ideas are a little more than we can afford (or just don't exist), like the (real) dragon my son wants or castle my daughter wants to live in.
Looking back on my strained relationship with my mom, I can see both sides of the arguments, as I have come to understand my mom (though I still don't usually agree). All I can do is try to understand that, although my daughter is not just an extension of me, she definitely inherited my stubbornness, as I did from my mom.
Thanks for reading!
- Vanessa
When I was in first grade and my sister, K, was in Kindergarten, my mom decided that my sister would look good with a perm in her hair. This was also in the '80s, and my mom permed her hair for way longer than was popular. She had just a little perm solution left and didn't want to waste it, so she wanted to use it to just perm my bangs. I did not want any part of my hair permed, let alone just my bangs. We got into a big argument (as was pretty common). I told her that I liked my hair and didn't want it permed. She just didn't want to waste the perm solution. She won, as she was a lot bigger than me and, even though I was stubborn, I was pretty obedient. I had to deal with just curly bangs, which I thought looked stupid. My sister had to deal with a full head of home permed hair, which wasn't much of an improvement over my hair.
My sister, D, had a security baby doll for years that she was pretty rough with. She used to drag it around by the hair, so her hair eventually was stuck in kind of a faux hawk. One day, while we were at school, my mom decided that she didn't like to look at the doll in our room and threw it away. Granted, when my kids break a toy, I throw it away, but other than having a permanent bad hair day, the doll was not broken, and D was very attached to it.
I believe that my mom saw my sisters and I as an extension of herself, and not our own selves with our own opinions and all. She liked certain styles, therefore, we had to, also. She didn't like other things, so therefore, we couldn't, either.
My favorite color is pink, and my daughter, K's, favorite color is bright purple. In a way, these colors sum us up. I really like light pink. It's subtle, yet pretty. My daughter is bold and vibrant. I try to consider what she would like when purchasing her clothes or anything else. I even correct my relatives when they are considering buying her anything. I know that she'd appreciate any new gift, but probably more so if it were also her favorite color. I actually resisted pink for a long time, and my favorite color was blue, though that may have been to spite my mom and resist wearing the pink that my mom forced on me. She believes that all girls should like pink. I believe that she would say that it is her favorite color, though I don't really think it is.
My hubby and I are redoing our kids' rooms, which is probably why my mom is on my mind more lately. My mom would redecorate the bedroom that my sisters and I shared whenever the mood struck her. She would see an idea in a magazine or in a movie and would redo our room without consulting us. Our room was redecorated a few times and I don't think any of us liked it, and I'm sure I told her so. I don't remember saying anything, but I wouldn't have put it past my younger self. I distinctly remember having bear and clown wall paper and then later it was painted mustard yellow.
I still don't like clowns or that shade of yellow. Had she consulted my sisters and I, we would have expressed our distaste before anything was done, instead of after she had put in all of the work to surprise us. It was a very vicious cycle with my mom. She'd like an idea and force it on us as hard as she could, and my sisters and I would tell her we didn't like it. She'd then play the martyr because she'd worked all day on redoing our room, just for us to tell her that we hated it. I can now partially see her side, as repainting a bedroom by yourself isn't easy. However, is it really a gift when someone sneaks into your room and paints it in ugly colors?
I did ballet when I was younger. I had always pictured my daughter doing ballet, just as I had. K did ballet last year. She enjoyed dressing up in the frilly outfit. Other than that, I suspect that she hated it. She said she enjoyed it, but she didn't like doing the precise movements and paying so much attention. There was just too much little and graceful movement for my bold and active daughter. My mom would have forced my sisters and I to continue. I found a gymnastics class for her to join, instead, and she loves it! There is much more running around and more movement. It is such a better fit for her, which makes me happy.
My hubby and I are including our kids in our redecorating brainstorming. Granted, we are working within a budget, so some of their ideas are a little more than we can afford (or just don't exist), like the (real) dragon my son wants or castle my daughter wants to live in.
Looking back on my strained relationship with my mom, I can see both sides of the arguments, as I have come to understand my mom (though I still don't usually agree). All I can do is try to understand that, although my daughter is not just an extension of me, she definitely inherited my stubbornness, as I did from my mom.
Thanks for reading!
- Vanessa
Saturday, February 2, 2013
Book Sale at the Library
Thanks for reading!
Vanessa
Getting my Closet Organized
Here is my closet before I cleaned it:
When I met my husband, I was a size 8/10. Let's just say that I'm not that size at the moment. We've been together for nearly 8 years and have 2 kids. My mother-in-law has lost a lot of weight over the last 3 years and has given me the clothes that have gotten too small for her. She has a good job and can afford to shop at nicer places, instead of Walmart, which is all I can afford. She is also nearly 6 inches shorter than I. Even if I lose the weight and get down to my goal weight, I am still tall enough that I really do need longer clothing to fit me the way that I like. I decided to get rid of most of these clothes, as most of them didn't fit me the way that I like.I sorted out the clothes by size and have been trying to sell them for really cheap on Craigslist to make some extra money. I haven't had any luck yet, as everyone that has contacted me has flaked out. I will try again for another week, and then I will donate them to a clothing bank. If I can't sell them, I'd rather they go to someone in need for free. I support Goodwill and go there myself, but I really have been fortunate enough to get help over the years and prefer to donate items that will be given away for free.
Here is my closet now. I have kept a couple of boxes. As I (hopefully) lose weight, I will be able to sort out more of the clothes.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)